Why are we so
quick to want our old bodies back after we birth our babies? What’s so awful
and shameful about the fine lines and soft belly? There’s real wisdom and experience in those
lines! And that belly held and nourished
life for nine months. And that body continues to sustain life and
will hopefully do so for many months (I am referring to breastfeeding
here). I wonder if part of our desire
comes from mass society’s fixation on tighter, firmer, and smaller body parts? In my experience, there’s not much joy in this
focus – it is narrow. Sure, going for hardy
walks with a baby can be enjoyable, though, in all honesty, the underlying
motivation is often for the tighter, firmer and smaller parts. As new mamas, we have just experienced
transformation on all levels – body, mind, and spirit. We are forever changed on all levels.
There is
also a keen focus in society on the joy and jubilation of being a new mother. And sure, we all need to hear about the
beauty and bliss, yet how about sharing some of the gritty bits on becoming a
new mom as well? It’s not to wallow in
the challenges, but it is to be authentic and honest about our experience as
new mothers. This reflection comes as
part of my personal process of understanding my role as a new mom, and also in
light of a recent tragedy in my community; a mother of a young child who chose
to end her life much too soon, in my opinion.
Women need a
gross amount of support and self-care during the first year of motherhood - more
than I ever thought possible. Who is
meant to spend 24/7 at home, often spending large amounts of time on her own
with her baby? Yes, I have experienced
many precious moments with my little guy snuggling, giggling, and smiling. Yet, there have also been many moments when
I wanted to pull out whatever remaining strands of hair I have left on this
head of mine.
All-in-all babies are our greatest treasures and some of the best teachers around. Having said this, I am forever grateful for my little guy – Joseph Skye. J
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